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Kissing is Exempt from the Sexuality Contract

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As long as hand-holding and kissing are not a prelude to full-on sex, you need not consider them as a violation of the Sexuality Contract that you make with your self. No, you don't have to wait for six months for the first kiss. No, you are not likely to be at risk for contracting STDs with kissing. You don't even need to discuss monogamy issues to engage in what should be a very pleasurable activity, as long as it doesn't go too far.

You've got to kiss an angel good morning and let her you know you think about her when you're gone. Kiss an angel good morning and love her like the devil when you get back home.
Lyrics by Charlie Pride

There are all kinds of kisses and I, for one, am a romantic at heart and want to know every one of them. I would hate to think that every single kiss is a prelude to sex, because then there wouldn't be nearly as many kisses in my life as I would like for them to be.

Remember what I said about those Hollywood movies? I begin to suspect that many people (or would that just be men, or would that be my prejudice showing?) regard kissing as foreplay, not an end in and of itself. One woman I know was too quick to follow kissiing with sex. She didn't realize, until years after their marriage, that her husband didn't actually enjoy kissing!

"You could be Alegra Cole's last first kiss"
Will Smith as Alex Hitchens in Hitch

While kissing is exempt from your contract, you still might want to handle this issue with care. Spontenaity not-with-standing, it might be a good idea to know that kissing needn't be foreplay. It's not your intention to be a tease, but it is helpful if you both know what your expectations are.

I know that, for myself, where my kisses go, my heart seems to follow. It's not just a case of, when I'm kissing someone, I want to take it to the next level, it's that I also get more emotionally involved. I know myself: I won't want to let it go at that. Even if I felt like it was safe to kiss someone, I'll start behaving in co-dependent ways that make it less likely that I will walk away from a bad match.

As with any aspect of the journey of getting to know one another better, it's important, then, to be clear about two things:

If you are in too great a hurry to proceed to the kissing stage, the odds increase that your potential partner will not, in fact, be your last first kiss. Treat your kisses as the precious things that they are; you don't have to share them with just anyone.

Read more about choices:

Sexuality Contract
Darbie Marlin

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Make a Contract with Your Self!Kissing: Handle with Care